Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I am available for nakedness
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
