I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize