and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
