don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
