And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
