**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
