porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize