I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
