So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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