Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
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