I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize