Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
