Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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