She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
