bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize