it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
