checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Ladies don't puke and tell
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
