it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize