My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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