I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
