i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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