Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
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