oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You dont lie about slip and slides
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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