At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
