Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Randomize
