he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
