We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
