i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
