My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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