are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Drake has all the answers
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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