What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
babies were throwing up all over the place
The beer is more important than you right now.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
