I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
