in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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