windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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