her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
