You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
