Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry usmcgillis hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(504): View more from Louisiana

Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??

Fav 74 957 3546
share tweet
(508): View more from Massachusetts

I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text

Fav 7 809 3459
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(404): View more from Georgia

I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.

(812): View more from Indiana

I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?

Fav 25 14586 1151
share tweet
(567): View more from Ohio

you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.

Fav 6 3534 894
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.

Fav 18 7110 1161
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.

Fav 6 3221 959
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.

Fav 15 3002 1332
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(636): View more from Missouri

They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.

Fav 0 890 517
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(978): View more from Massachusetts

What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.

Fav 2 19 70
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT