My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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