he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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