It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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