Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
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