You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
foreskin is a definite game changer
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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