Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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