Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
