Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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