not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
