She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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