so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
