Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize