i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
organizing the empties. That sober.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Green mimosas i think yes
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
